YThursday, February 18, 2010 Y
I am Truely , Deeply & Madly in Love with You
Emo day..
To make my day more emo... RH sms me all of a sudden saying ..
"你是我心中永远的痛。我用了很多方法忘记你可是这样也做不到"
ME: How come suddenly will sms me? i thot u ask me dun contact u anymore? and u deleted me from fb but i thot u got attached"
"1 of my ways to forget u ba. Lately, all in my mind was u. Maybe my reaction is retarded which I sld react tis way along time ago. Yes i did ask u nt to contact me, part of my way to runaway from all tis pain which i cant deal wif. When we patch back, i keep holding myself back. I noe u wan me to say i love u all the sweet words which i use to say. I didnt. i dun wan to give u any empty promises which i cant even keep. All our schedule crash. u work from morning to evening. I work from morning to noon, but gotta go to camp for training from 6pm to 8pm. And it's even worse its 2 days per week which last for a month and 3 days per week which last for another month. I am naive to think maybe u'll wait for me but u didn. I was devasted when I knew u r attached. I didn cry, but was bleeding inside"
Me: i dunno wad else to say.. when we patch back last year i dun feel the love from u anymore it was like everything has changed i was the only one who care for this relationship. i tried so hard for so many months. i was never important to you in the both so i decided to give up. all the best for your new relationship.
"I was nv in relationship. I tot action would have speak louder den works. I wan to express myself to you but i just been stress out by my family matters. work and my future. I noe i dun deserve any chance in ur life anymore, deep down inside me, i still feel and care for u. and i hope tt there is a 2nd chance to prove tt i love u"
Me: i have given u a 2nd chance last year but u din cherish me as usual. wad action did you take to prove to me? nothing
"U r right i didn cherish u. I keep everything to myself coz i didn wan u to worry for me. Guess i was stupid enuff to let u go again. I noe I had hurt u badly so i guess a bad guy like me dun deserve a 2nd chance anymore ba. But i dun wish tt it to end this way"
Me: dun wish tt it to end tis way den wad u want?
"Pls dun slp. I am cabbing down to ur hse nw. And can i meet u at ur hse staircase? U r the 1 i still love. i still feel for, u r the 1 tt's irreplacable. I really hope u will give another chance"
Me: Now wad time le zzz if u know me well enough u know this type of timing i dun leave house de
"U dun need to leave ur hse. Jus have to open ur door and stretch ur hand out"
Me: dun come.. that time you dun even have to courage to come esplanade why come now
"i am already outside ur hse le"
And he tried to put the ring back onto my finger.. which I stopped him from doing so.. Another chance is not available anymore.. I am attached.. Happily attached.. And I want to carry on being with my silly boy..
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It took u so long to realise that I am the one u wanted. Whats the point of saying all these now. I gave u 2 chances already. I haven never patched back with any of the guys b4 bcoz I feel that things will never work out de. Once over is over. But I gave u another chance. U never cherished it. I was still never the one who meant something to you. Never the one who has a place in your heart. Never the one that you will care for nor feel hurt seeing me getting hurt. I was never the one you wanted. U never love me as who I am but love me as who I can become for your sake. I want to be there to share not just your happiness but your everything and u r never willing to let me into your life. I am forever standing outside at the door there knocking on the door waiting for u to let me in. Whats the point of opening the door to let me in when I have already walked away from u and found someone who knows hw to cherish me more, love me truely and willing to let me step into his life.
:: Ah Ber ::
